


The ones you left behind

by needmesomepie



Series: What do you call home when it can all so easily change [1]
Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: I'm Sorry, M/M, hate me later okay, i already hate myself too much as it is
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-17
Updated: 2017-06-17
Packaged: 2018-11-13 12:20:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11185008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/needmesomepie/pseuds/needmesomepie
Summary: Just when Barry Allen had finally found his place, had found the one he wanted to spend forever with, had finally planned out a future, Zoom had to come and ruin it all over again. And sometimes, the only way to solve one problem is by doing the unthinkable. Sometimes it means sacrificing your life for the greater need of the world. Sometimes it means putting all others before yourself.Just because a timeline was changed in one way, there are no rules that say it can never be changed again.And just because Barry changed the timeline once, there's no saying he won't do it again and this time, make the biggest mistake of his life.





	The ones you left behind

**Author's Note:**

> Ever wondered what the Julian's, Caitlin's, Cisco's, Iris's, Joe's, Wally's, HR's etc. that Barry leaves behind in alternate timelines end up like?
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> Wonder no more friends
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> Also pre warning, i've fucked up the timelines again (i know, i'm awful) so you'll just have to pretend that Julian and HR were around at the time of Zoom or this is just going to be more of a mess than it already is
> 
> try and enjoy (and not wish death upon me too much)

Barry needed to run and he needed to run fast. He along with Caitlin and Cisco had calculated it, he knew how fast he could run without breaking the timeline, without running back in time and leaving this timeline that he so desperately wanted to stay in forever. Barry could beat Zoom and still be home in time for tea. But he knew it came with risks. Their calculations may be inaccurate, Barry could run slightly too fast or not fast enough, Zoom could catch onto their plan, Barry's speed might falter and all manner of other things. But at face value, he was confident. He knew what he had to do and he knew how he was going to do it and provided everything went to plan, no one on earth would even realise anything had happened. It should, in theory, _be_ _over in a flash_.

But Barry still took the time to say goodbye to everyone, just in case, just in case something went wrong. Because something could go wrong. The risk factor was far too high for any normal kind of operation. But this wasn't just any mission, this wasn't your average criminal or meta. This was Zoom. They all knew that extreme measures would have to be taken at one point or another, they just never imagined that those measures could possibly lead to the loss of one of the team. 

He started by thanking Caitlin and Cisco for everything they'd done, from nursing him through a coma to helping him improve his powers with each day that came. He thanked them for being the best friends anyone could ever wish for, telling them he wished them nothing but happiness in their futures, with or without him by their sides. Tears fell and hugs were exchanged before Barry left, a call of 'see you in about an hour' following him out.l

Next was Joe, Iris and Wally who had stayed in the cortex whilst Barry, Cisco and Caitlin had gone down to the lab. It was more hugs and tears from them than it was words. They all knew he'd probably be back, but the risk of him leaving and getting stuck somewhere else was still floating in the air around them. Barry thanked them for being the best family he could have ever asked for, thanked Joe for taking him in when it was never his responsibility. He thanked them for just accepting him when he never expected any of that. Joe of course asked if this was the only way to beat Zoom, already knowing the answer seen as he'd asked it a thousand times before. Barry smiled and nodded, solemn and slow, yet still with a strong defiance about him.

He moved to HR after, fulfilling the guy's fantasy of that weird and wacky handshake he'd somehow taught Barry before wrapping his arms around the other in what can only be described as a 'manly' hug. He told HR how much he appreciated his help over these past months, how he'd become an invaluable and irreplaceable member of the team and more than anything, a really good friend. He thanked him before standing back.

With one final glance around STAR Labs, and a final bid of farewell, Barry sped off to his last location before this whole thing went into play. The CCPD.

His last temporary goodbye was to Julian. He knew he'd be back, but just in case, just in case something went wrong and he was back in a time where they hated each other, he had to take the chance now. So with the adrenaline pumping through his veins and an overwhelming urge filling his gut, Barry sped into their lab and stopped right in front of Julian, the other man not even flinching.

"Aren't you supposed to be out saving the world, All-" But Julian's words were swallowed by Barry's lips as they connected with his. Barry wasn't sure if the feelings he harboured for his scruffy but perfect co worker were reciprocated, but he'd have hated himself forever if he'd disappeared without trying. And after a few seconds, any worries or concerns Barry had faded out as an overwhelming passion took over him. Julian was a damn good kisser when he wanted to be and right now, he most definitely did. The two of them connected in ways they never thought they could, never thought possible. They were lost in a passion, an addiction they were each providing and any coherent thought Julian had as to whether this was an appropriate thing to be doing in the middle of their lab with the door wide open was washed out when Barry tilted his head slightly, so that Julian had much more access to the pleasures that were being provided. He was in a state of bliss, like he was dancing above the clouds in a shower of cinnamon and coffee. Because that's what Barry tasted like and it was  _divine_.

The kiss was over much too soon for either party's liking. Barry took to apologising for leaving and thanking Julian for always being there, for always being that steady and stable rock that kept Barry grounded. Thanked him for the insight he allowed into the way he solved cases, and the past that lead him here. He thanked him for always just being 'Julian' and never anyone else, even when the world tried so hard to change him. Barry thanked him for everything and anything all at once, just anything he could think of to make this moment mean something more. Because Julian meant the world to him and he wanted to show that in the limited amount of time he possibly had left.

Julian was confused to say the least, the last he'd heard was that Barry was going to save the world from Zoom and that was it. He knew the risks, understood them. Or at least he thought he did. But the whole goodbye spiel from Barry wasn't boding well for Julian's mind at that moment. And when Barry said goodbye, pecked him on the lips and ran off as fast as he'd appeared, without so much as a word from Julian, he rang Caitlin to ask what was going on, finding out that Barry just wanted to make sure all bases were covered if something were to go wrong. It helped quell his worry slightly but not completely, especially not now after learning that Barry felt the same about him as he did Barry. 

 

Just minutes later Barry was already at the scene where he would take on Zoom. He was prepared, he'd said goodbye, he was suited up, he was planning where he would take Julian on their first date. He checked his headset and he closed his eyes for a brief second to prepare himself, to just take in a much needed deep breath. When he opened his eyes, Zoom was standing before him, dressed in his signature black suit, what seemed to be blue lightning bouncing off him in every direction. He went over the plan in his head before he ran. Before he ran like he'd never run before, straight into the path of his enemy.

And it was all going well, everything was following the plan perfectly, Barry was not only keeping up with Zoom, but he was running just slightly ahead. Until Zoom sped off, an unknown amount of energy suddenly surging through him and carrying him way ahead of Barry. And Barry knew he could keep up, knew he could still catch him, but he would go above the carefully calculated speed that had been set for him. The speed that if he were to go above it, he would most likely not be coming back, not in the present time anyway. Barry knew all this and he still started running, the overall safety of the world always coming above his own needs and desires. Caitlin, Cisco and everyone else in the cortex knew what was happening when Barry's speed flashed red on their screen, the way it was programmed to do if he went above that set speed. They watched in shock and admiration as Barry slowly but surely caught up with Zoom, listening in silence as Barry's voice came through the speakers telling them all that he loved them and that he was sorry. And then he, along with Zoom, was gone.

 

Barry Allen just always seemed to change the timeline right after he'd finally gotten what he wanted.

 

He found himself in a new one, one where STAR Labs was still run by Harrison Wells. One where there was already a speedster running around in a yellow suit apparently saving the world, whilst at the same time looking all too eerily similar to that of Eobard Thawn. One where he'd apparently moved out of the West's after a row with Joe and had never returned. And worst of all, this apparent universe had never heard of, nor ever been home to anyone that went by the name of 'Julian Albert'. Barry had been prepared to go back to a time that they hated each other, had been prepared to work through that all over again if it still meant that he had Julian there with him everyday. But being in a world where he didn't exist, where he'd never existed? Barry couldn't think of a fate worse and he knew, that from that moment, even though the trip had taken every last bit of energy out of him, he would find his way back to his original timeline. He would find a way back to his friends and family and away from this god awful existence. He would find his way back to Julian.

 

And back in that original timeline, Julian Albert sat on the floor by Barry's desk, tears in his eyes and countless missed calls from Caitlin on his phone. Barry had run off just after their first kiss, and he'd never come back. Years went by and Julian never heard from him again, never heard of him again. It was like he'd just disappeared from the face of the earth. Maybe he was dead, or maybe he was just so ashamed he'd kissed Julian that he'd run across the oceans to be as far away as he possibly could. And whilst at the time Julian knew the risks and understood what Barry had tried to say with that kiss, if you leave a person questioning something for long enough, they will always somehow turn the situation around to be an attack on themselves. Always make it so that it's somehow all their fault that something happened. If you leave a person long enough, they turn into a shell of the person they once were and they become so emotionally fragile that they lose all will they ever had to go on.

And Julian wasn't even a man now, he looked old, withered and frayed. He was a walking skeleton, covered barely by a thin layer of skin devoid of almost all muscle. His skin was grey, his eyes hollow, emotionless. His cheeks stained red from the constant tears running down his face. He was hollow, his heart torn in two and a mind unwilling to find a reason to go on. He'd left his job just months after it happened, unable to see that empty chair day in day out. Unable to cope with the feeling of a ghostly presence that just never seemed to go away. Unable to wake up without remembering what Barry's lips felt like against his as if it had happened just minutes ago.

Barry may have left this timeline and created a new life in another, but the life he left behind, the  _ones_ he left behind, they were never quite the same again. They never quite got over that sudden loss.

 

But Barry Allen was always one for surprise gestures. Always one to make a lasting impression. Always one to say goodbye in person and then later in his own special way.

That was why, laying, untouched, in the bottom of Julian's second desk drawer was a once steaming cup of coffee and a once fresh doughnut, placed delicately atop a single yellow post it note that read -

 

_Just in case it all goes wrong,_

_i've always loved you and i always will._

_And i will always find my way back to you,_

_just promise me you'll wait._

_All my love, always,_

_Barry X_

 

 

It was just a shame that Julian never bothered to clear out his desk when he left the station.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not even going to apologise
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> Okay no i am i'm so so so so so so so so so so sorry i cannot believe i put my babies through this i cannot _believe_ i did this to them i am an awful human being and please feel free to hate me forever
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> ps. do you want a part 2 because i want a part 2 and i will write a part 2 if you all want a part 2
> 
> okay bye


End file.
